Marcus Henderson's Money Story

Brenton: [00:00:00] In this episode of My Money Stories, we talked to a father figure of mine, a professional mentor. The person who brought me through this industry, showed me what was possible, that I could build a practice serving people who look like me, people in my community, people that I love, and I'm forever grateful to him for that. So I hope you enjoy this session where I sit down and talk a little bit about the money story of Marcus t Henderson, Sr. Let's get started. [00:01:00] Brenton: All right, Marcus. Thank you. Welcome to the New Money, New Problems Marcus: podcast. Good to be here. Great to share with you guys. Brenton: Okay. I've, I've given my own little brief introduction as to the basis of our relationship and mentor mentee, but if you could, I have not shared what you do. So. Introduce yourself, say who you represent. Marcus: Certainly it, it, it, I, I will do that as best I can. I am Marcus Henderson. I am president and c e o of Henderson Financial Group. We've been around for, Three decades, which I'm, I'm very proud of that we've seen a lot of people come through and, and go on in addition, if that were not enough in 2021 I was elected as the treasurer and c f O of the oldest Black Incorporated denomination in history, the African Methodist Episcopal Church. Brenton: Okay. And a lot of that plays into your history in terms of your family and how you were raised. So if you could share a [00:02:00] little bit about how you came into that church and who your parents are. Sure. Marcus: My father was a minister, actually, my father was a chaplain in the Air Force. And once he got out he became an AME pastor as well. So, I've had it on both sides. My father tremendous showman. He was, he was good in the pulpit and my mother was a workaholic. She would work multiple jobs just cuz she wanted to not, I don't know if it was always necessary, but she enjoyed that. So what you have that's sitting before you is a product of both of them. I, I, if I need to do one thing, I could do it. And if I need to do the other, I can do it. So, yeah, that, that's something that I'm, I'm very proud of the combination of my mother and my father and I can now, as I get older, I can see which one I'm leaning upon in different situations. Okay. Tell me about Brenton: that. When, when are you your mom and when are you your dad? Marcus: Yeah. You know, he, he, he, that, that's, so first of all, start with mom. My [00:03:00] mother was, like I said, she was really, and, and, and maybe that's too much to say a workaholic, but she stayed constantly employed and she would be employed in multiple situations. I started working when I was 13 years old, went down to McDonald's in a suit, and when I got down there, the owner at the time was Mr. Roland Jones. Many people may know him. And Roland looked at me and we went through the interview and he said, now, son, I know that you're not 16 years old, but you are the best dressed person here. And I would be ridiculous not to hire you because you've answered the questions better than some of the 16 year olds. So that was my first job, and, and I can very proud to say I've been continuously employed since I was 13 years old. So that's when I'm acting like mom. Now on the other half my father you know, when you look at the way that I dress, I will shine my shoes every night before I wear them the next day. He, he said, Marcus, you know, son people are impressed first by how you look. And he [00:04:00] said, you can't get around it. So make sure that you dress not for yourself, but you dress for those that may be in observance. So, you know, things have changed now in the world, but interestingly enough even the way that I, I dress now it makes me stand out even more because most people are not dressed that way. And they will come up and they will give me compliments and inevitably will ask me, what do you do for a living? Which is a great opening into the financial services, Ram and, or recruiting for the African Methodist, the Episcopal church. Yeah, I'm, you Brenton: know, I'm. Need to check out child labor loss from when you started that job at McDonald's. Marcus: There's, there's an extension to that. There's a, there's a little bit more to that. The human services came in at 16 to, and as they will do to check everybody's birth dates and everything. They came in and I had to turn my stuff in, and they didn't come in until I was 16. And they looked at it, and I remember the supervisor saying, you know, Mr. Henderson, [00:05:00] everything's okay. But it sure is interesting how you've only been 16 for six months, but you've worked here for 24 months. And I just kinda laughed and he let me go. You know, I, I've always, I can't see at, at that time idle hands were the devil's workshop and I didn't have anything to do. And I, I would come home from school. I played football as in the sports and all of those different things, but I still found myself, I'm an only child. So when you're an only child, you find yourself with lonely or quiet periods. So in my mind it was to my good to find employment. And it was just something during that period of time, they wasn't checking that hard. They wasn't looking that hard, and I'm thankful for it. So you Brenton: also talked about dress and, I record, you know, dress down and, but you, you know that when I'm going and I'm meeting new people and when I'm out in the community, I make sure that I leave an impression with how I dress. Now, part of that is how I was raised. But it also is a result of [00:06:00] a conversation where you got into me the first year that I was in this business I was in training. And on Friday we had casual Friday and you could wear a polo and khakis. And you came in and you saw me on a Friday making calls and I had on a polo and khakis, and you pulled me into the hallway and you said, Hey bro, lemme tell you something. Do you remember what it was Marcus: that you told me? I, I don't remember exactly, but I certainly, I'll let you elaborate on that, but I know where I was going with it. Yeah. So Brenton: this is a man of God, but you know, man of God sometimes cursed, Marcus: Not clergy, you Brenton: told me. And it, it really is putting the lesson in my mind. That when you're in certain spaces, you have to go above and beyond. And you were talking about just some of the struggles that we go through gaining respect as black advisors, and you said, I don't care what casual Friday they have [00:07:00] going on, you're a black man going out in the world trying to convince people to let you manage their money. If they have on a collared shirt, you need to have on a button-up shirt. If they have on a button-up shirt, you need to have on a tie. If they have on a tie, you need to have on a suit. If they have on a suit, you need to have on a tux. And if they have on a tux, you better have on a tux with motherf#%!king tails. Marcus: Let, lemme tell you, thank you for, for reminding me, Brenton. Yes, I do remember the conversation Here's the deal. We all know as African-Americans just being par is, is not enough. We, whether it's education whether it's sports, whether it's anything business we have to be a cut above. And that's because you have to rise above the noise. You know, one of the things that I, I was doing back then that I didn't realize that I was doing was branding myself. And I think we all have to brand ourselves. Now, I will say the [00:08:00] world has evolved, but for some people, their branding is so crystal clear that it attracts the marketplace that they're looking for a as, as I say all the time, I'm, I'm not looking for everyone to become a client. I'm looking for the ones that should be my clients to be. And that what that, what happens with that is when they see me, when we share time, either by Zoom or in person, I don't have to have them figure out who I am because it will resonate with them, and they will either accept it or they won't. You know, I tell clients all the time, You're not just looking at me, I'm looking at you because you are investing your money. I'm investing my firm's time. Some very talented individuals that will care for your most, one of your most precious assets. So if we can't do it in a way that is comfortable both ways, we probably just need to, to break early and not worry about this, I will invest [00:09:00] one hour into anyone. Then after that, it becomes a financial decision whether or not we need to continue forward. Yeah. And I think. Brenton: To me, what endured from that is there is no value in being in a room full of 50 people and looking and sounding and acting like the other 50 people. So let's go back to childhood. Yeah. You mentioned your mother's work ethic. You mentioned your father being a showman, and one of the things I think is consistent when I talk to men of your age, Marcus: no incident, men of That's right, men of a certain age we call it okay. Brenton: Is you can have all of these, especially in the minority community, all of these wonderful attributes of a parent, of a grandparent. That don't necessarily translate into financial success. You're from North Nashville. That's right. North Nashville has a unique history, long history in the [00:10:00] civil rights movement. Parts of North Nashville were reserved for educators and black physicians and PhDs who raised their family there. You also have 37, 208, which at least a few years ago may still be. That's right. The zip code in America where you have the highest likelihood of being incarcerated as a black man. Marcus: And that's the zip code I come from, right. That, that's it. I, I come from 37,208 was there over 20 years. So all of my formative years were, were, were set right there in what you just described. Brenton: So how does that lead to you getting a job in financial services? Marcus: As I matriculated through school and everything, I thought Brenton. I thought I wanted to be a stockbroker, but I learned very quickly. That stockbrokers probably need to know people that had money. Now, once again, I was from 37 2 0 8. I knew no one that you know, had money of that, that magnitude. But I, let me [00:11:00] put a caveat there. I'm gonna come back to something. You know, so it made sense for me to be in a profession that allowed and allowed me to assist people in developing wealth, managing the wealth, and then pass it on to future generations. Now, here's something about wealth. So my grandmother she was a domestic. We had to go out to Bellmead when I was out of school. I would go with her when I was very young to bellmead to these really nice luxury homes where she was basically the maid sometimes the, the babysitter, all of the things that would go with a domestic relationship. And I went there one day and it was to the Armstead residence. And I'll never forget, I knew something was different when their backyard was as big as the whole field that we used to play football in down the street. Like now that's [00:12:00] interesting. They had the swing sets, they had all of those. Now, if that was not enough, I, I befriended the young gentleman there. His, his name was Jimmy. He was about my age. And we went down to his playroom. Now, you know, you, you say playroom, you, you picture something. But at my age, I did not picture, I. A room that was as big as my whole house, and it had everything from trains to trucks to blow up. I mean, just everything. And I remember leaving on the way home because my grandmother and I had to ride the bus, and I remember looking outside as we were riding down the Bellmead Boulevard thinking, wait a minute, there is something different. And I knew that difference had to do with finance. And from that point on I realized that there was a different difference in the communities. There were d difference in [00:13:00] economic abilities. So I became intrigued to understand the astuteness and become astute in finances made really good sense to me. And that's where it began. I started thinking I was gonna be a, a stockbroker. That that was not quite it. And this profession at that time was evolving and I was very blessed to be a part of. What was your first job in the industry? My first job in the industry was working for John Hancock Financial Services. And interestingly enough I was, they had what's called the long-term care Fast start so what you were supposed to do is make, you know, a hundred phone calls to people that you didn't know. At the time. There was no do not call list. The people would call you and say, oh yeah, I'd like to Look at some long-term care. You didn't have people in, you went out to see them. Most of them were working during the day, so you would see them at night. I'll never forget I was excited about this particular one, young lady. She [00:14:00] sounded very promising about what I was going to present that night. I went to the house and knocked on the door and she, I realized that she was of another ethnicity. She may not have realized that I was, so I knocked on the door and I'll never forget, she looked out and, you know, it was middle age. Caucasian woman looked out and she saw this African-American male pretty much in his prime, standing on the door talking about, let me in. Well, that night she said, I've changed my mind. I don't want any. And I realized at that point that once again This would be a different profession for me. It would not be one that we could just open up to anybody from any background unless that was completely transparent. Because clearly when we were on the phone, I was excited because she was excited. But when the view of who was delivering the product, delivering the [00:15:00] services was clear she went back to the well, A and and that's okay because it taught me something. It taught me that sometimes the ones that are teaching you are not the ones to be teaching you. You have to be taught by like people so that they can, you know, a truly a smart person learns from their own mistakes, but a truly wise person learns from the mistakes of others. And at that time I was smart, but I wasn't wise. And I decided at that time to seek out people that were just like me. People that were in the profession had been there. And from that point on I was blessed. And during, during that time, I, I did find that other profession, other ethnic backgrounds were similar such as Jewish backgrounds some in Hispanic backgrounds. They were like, maybe not the same and even Asian backgrounds. So thus I was able to put myself in a position, in a position to, to [00:16:00] hedge my bet on the success of a relationship. [00:17:00] Brenton: In terms of being a black advisor in this country, you were one of the premier ones in terms of the size of the firm, in terms of the size of the revenue. And to me, what's interesting is when you have a business owner or just a person with a lot of responsibility, you are keyed in on the responsibility that you have, but you also have a financial life in your personal life. That you're trying to develop while you're developing a business. Yeah. Has that been Marcus: difficult? Oh my gosh, yes. You know, one of the things that I like to say for any of the entrepreneurs out there is that you are an entrepreneur with a specialty in medicine, and especially in finance and specialty, in, you know, mortgages or whatever, but understand you are a entrepreneur [00:18:00] first with that specialty. And here, here's what I mean by that. If you're an entrepreneur, you go through entrepreneurial things. I at one time owned one of the top producing mortgage companies in the state of Tennessee until 2007 and 2008 came and the mortgage industry experienced a severe drawback. We were doing fine, but there were nowhere to fund the loans. So one of the things that occurred with me is that it was going on during the Christmas season, and I didn't have it in my heart to shut down the company as people were going into that last quarter. So, as I look back on it, I probably kept the company open six months longer than maybe I should have, and I funded it. Their salaries, their health insurance, all of the things that were necessary from my pocket. Now, a lot of people wouldn't maybe have done that, but it was my decision [00:19:00] and I'm completely pleased with that because here's the deal. At the end of the day, you learn things through the experiences that you've gone through, and you learn the most through the difficult experiences. See, we all take successful experiences and we take that in stride, keep on moving. We don't even think about it, but, oh, when a little pain is inflicted, all of a sudden you realize, okay, I wanna handle that differently next time. So that was something, but I, I look back on it, I don't regret it at all. But it also taught me that I wanna make sure that from a financial standpoint, each one of the companies are set up where they can hold themselves financially for a certain period of time. Now, the truth of the matter is there was absolutely nothing we could have done with the mortgage industry. That was when there was the total collapse. No one saw it coming. The banking industry collapsed. So it was a, I was a part of a bigger whole, but I'm so thankful. That [00:20:00] I went through that because the truth of the matter, it gave me a resiliency about business that you can overcome. It may not overcome when you want it to overcome, but all of the lessons, all of the histories, all of the things you have gone through, have brought you to this point of consciousness and you will get through. So I'm thankful for that to be sitting here at 56 years old, having that all under my belt. Brenton: Again, you've attained a level of success that may not have been unimaginable for you, but definitely exceeds that of many of the people with which you grew up. When I came and started at 23 years old, 13 years ago. Yeah. Working at Henderson Financial Group. I was still hanging and spending tremendous amount of time with the people I grew up with. And I remember a conversation that we had when we were talking about life and the way relationships change and the way [00:21:00] success changes relationships. Sure. And you said, you know, I hope it doesn't happen to you, but there will come a time where the friends in your life that you grew up with will separate themselves. And there will be a group of people who have achieved certain things and there will be people who have not. And at that time it becomes very tough to maintain relationships where you can be your authentic self if you're one of the successful ones in that group. That's right. That's right. And the reason you said that, and I want you to elaborate on it, was you can reach a point where if you look at your friend group and you want to talk about the problems that you're experiencing, the problems you're experiencing are an insult to them. They would kill for those problems. Champagne Marcus: problems. Brenton: Champagne problems. That's right. But it doesn't make them any less of a problem for you. Yeah. How has that impacted your life as you've Marcus: Oh my gosh. That, that, that's, thank you. [00:22:00] So for that leading question, you know, one of the things that happened and like we, we, to remind us, we, I'm from 37 2 0 8, so most of my friends were from that area. Well, what happens is that, You almost get blamed for any success that you had. The thing about two things about success, the first thing is that the person that is successful usually doesn't look at themselves at successful because they're working so hard in the background. Much like the duck the duck on top seems to be just going down the water, but their little legs are working very, very fast underneath any type of stream or sometime against the stream. Well, that's how it looks. I know for sure that a lot of people think I just travel and just talk to people and just show up, and that's okay because what they're, what's really happening, and I, and to all my dear friends, is that eventually you have to evaluate self. And the older we get, we all made [00:23:00] choices. We all chose to do things. Our way as we as, as some would say. When I was younger, I would spend time reading motivational books and I remember clearly people in my community saying, what are you do? Whatcha you trying to get motivated for? And you know, just the, the questions that you and I look back on that, that was God working on me. Because first of all, how did I even get access to that? Well, I got access to that because I went with my grandmother out to Bellmead and I saw the books in the library. Well, first of all, what was the library? I said, what's all these books? And I remember, so it's the little things people try to concentrate. So much on the big things in life and generally success is found in the common hours when you're not even looking for it. I was just going through the house, I was going through the area of the house that my grandmother told me specifically not to go into because that's for grown [00:24:00] folk. I went back there and started looking up and, and I saw Zig Ziglar and I, I saw Jim Rohn and I saw Les Brown and I read, and I, you know, I'd look at these books and they were saying very positive things at a time when I needed positive things sown in into me, and it just stuck. So it's really no excuse. I heard something the other day that you will appreciate and it said this, what is the difference between someone that can't read and someone that won't read absolutely nothing? Mm. Brenton: Okay. Powerful. It you also, y your mother passed recently. Yes. I know she was very important to you as mothers are. Before she passed she was in a home. Mm-hmm. And we are talking about. Some of the guilt that you can feel or some of that residue of success that can alter relationships with your friends. Yes. There [00:25:00] was something that happened with the cost of your mother's home before she died, that was even an experience in terms of where you are versus what she expected with your own mother. Absolutely. Can you share what happened? Marcus: A absolutely. So, towards you know, the end of mama's life towards, you know, five years or so mom had never really attained the level of success that she expected out of life. Now, a lot of people would call her very successful, but what I have found is that does anyone really gain the level of success they are expecting out of themselves? Well, I. To that point, mom would never take any money from me. I would be like, mom, I'll take care of it. You don't have to take care of me. I take care of myself. Okay. But she finally got to the point where she would allow for me to take care of, of her incidentals of, of different things. Well, there became a point where she needed some extreme [00:26:00] assistance. And Lord knows she got mad. We put her into a place right down the street here from the office, which I think for most people would be deemed as, as pretty expensive. So what I tried to do was put her there and I had it drafted out of my account and somehow the other. Somebody at that place put a bill upstairs so that she knew it was paid for. Well, she found out how much it cost, and she told me that I couldn't afford that. You can't afford to pay for that. And thankfully, you know, we had the conversation and my spouse, Yolanda asked the question, how do you know what we can afford, the room we require? She said, what? I just know we have. Okay, but mama, how do, do you know? And she couldn't answer the question. So we were able to temper her feelings a little bit with that. But every month she was upset with the price that we were paying, which it was [00:27:00] not an amount to laugh at. But certainly if you're an only child or if you're a child at all and you have the ability to pay for your mother's care, you pay for it. And there was a situation and a turn where she was going to have to go into assisted living. The, the amount was going to jump quite a bit. Maybe about 50%. I was prepared for it for that to happen. But apparently mom was not. And she stayed over there for one week and she had some situations and they had to take her to the doctor. And she said, look, here, let's be clear. If y'all take me outta this room, I'm not coming back. And of course, the the caregiver and everything was, oh, Leila, please, you, you bring you to the hospital, everything's gonna be us. She said, no, I'm telling you I'm not coming back. Well, on the way to the hospital she had a massive heart attack and she lost consciousness, lost blood to the brain and all of those things. And by the time I got there she [00:28:00] had pretty much made the call for me and I just had to ask them to take them off. I say that is that, as you know, hindsight being 2020, my mother told me that I'm not gonna let you pay anymore. I'm not. And, you know, I heard her say it, but I didn't hear her say it. And I paid it for about two weeks, that higher amount. And she decided that she was gonna get her way. I, I, I bring that up only because the planning that we do for individuals it only seems to come in at very important times, very emotional times. It's not, you know, it is not the happy times. Everybody wants to get to a happy retirement, but the truth of the matter is that about, you know, 75% of the people out there are ill prepared to retire. So just cuz you retired don't mean it's gonna be a great situation. May mean you gonna go get another job. So the happy instances that occur within our community, very much have to be [00:29:00] planned opportunities things. That are not something that just happens. It, it, nothing can just happen. You have to plan for it. And the successful clients that I've had the honor to work with all understand that. And they have decided that as much as possible. Cause even when you do it all the way, as much as possible, I'm gonna take control of my finances. Okay, Brenton: let's go. Your answer doesn't have to be rapid fire, but let's go through some of the things that you've shared with me over the years that I share to this point. What is the strangest secret? Marcus: The strangest secret is very simple. It's that you get what you think about. That's the problem. That's the success. If you can just focus on and control your thoughts, you will actually get it. But what happens with most people, particularly in our new social media and all of that, you know, if you get on Instagram, it will take you down the rabbit hole. You can be [00:30:00] there for two hours just scrolling, going through videos and everything. Well, what's happened is that you have lost control of your thoughts. The strangest secret is that you get what you think about if you are thinking and you are not just mindlessly doing other things. So whether that's Facebook, Instagram, or, or certainly music that happens, sometimes people get into a music zone and what you thinking about? I ain't thinking about nothing. Well, Lord, we don't wanna keep you in that zone. So the strangest secret is that you get what you think about, but you have to think. Brenton: What is the School of Transactions? Marcus: School of Transactions says this. It says that whatever situation you are in, and, and I would have to liken this to being a financial advisor, is that you go through so many times of hearing the same concerns, the same situations, that once you go through that school of transaction so many times, you are able to [00:31:00] identify where the line of success should be imparted the school of transaction. Just treat it, it just teaches you what works and what doesn't work. Most advisors don't stay, whether you're a financial advisor, c p a, or whatever, they don't stay in the profession long enough to identify what all the situations are. They don't, they didn't go through the school of transactions, so thus, Every time something comes up, it is the first time for them and they're in a position where they're trying to figure it out. You know, all attorneys are licensed legally, but some are litigators some are corporate attorneys. Some are estate planning. You don't want a corporate attorney trying to do your litigation, nor your estate planning will. They are licensed to do it, but they haven't had enough of the school of transactions to tell you where the points are. Yeah. I remember when Brenton: I first started in the industry, you said the [00:32:00] best thing that you can do right now is meet with as many people as you possibly can. And when you meet with as many people as you possibly can, especially when those people are similar, similar eco socioeconomic status similar family background, you start to have a conversation so many times and see the trends in those kind conversations that you reach the point where, you know, the next question they're gonna ask before they ask it. But you also know through experience what works in terms of solving the answer to that question and what doesn't because of the repetition. Sure, sure. And it's not until you have that repetition where you can truly say that you're an expert because you haven't experienced it enough to see the downside of answering it the wrong way. Marcus: I, I tell clients all the time, you don't come to me because of the products and services that we [00:33:00] utilize. You can get that at the bank. You come to me because I've sat down with people like you for over 30 years answering the exact questions that you about to ask me, and I can tell you which way works and which way did not work. And more importantly, I can tell you why. Brenton: Wise words from a wise man. You know, I always appreciate you. I appreciate what you've meant to me over the years. In the intro, you'll hear what you are well aware that you're a second father to me. And that's something that I cherish and I cherish relationships like the one we have. So, I appreciate you, I love you, and I thank you for being a guest on the New Money, Marcus: New Problems podcast guests. I, I cannot express. More of the same in the way of, of love and respect. I have watched you through the years and I say it all the time, Brenton is the son you always wish we could have. And, and not to say anything against my children, cause Lord knows I love my children, but Brenton's just done a really, really wonderful job and you [00:34:00] all continue to listen to him. He's guiding you the right way. He's the next generation, he's the next. And we always gotta have the next, cuz if we don't have the next we'll stay stagnant where we are. God bless you and be encouraged.